Happy then Bothered

It was a happy day for me. The media bunch is great and jolly to be with. The usual me is slowly creeping back. However, I discovered that the moment I stepped into 8th floor, this wave of fakeness emerged from me. I don't really like the environment there. I guess it's psychological but I don't want to turn into a fakey like them too!! But today was a good start, a fresh, brand new day. The day passed by so quickly. Must have been the company. sk is a great fun to be with. Laughed alot, joked and crapped. :D

Then came the bothering part: was talking to aunt sp when she brought up the topic of job seeking after internship. A whole load of questions that left me staring at the screen point blank. That got me depressed quite a bit. Hurrr... I hate to think too much INTO the future and what lies ahead. But sometimes people say I think too much.

What do you think?

Fresh Start to a Fresh Week

It's a brand new week. Brand new department that I will be going to. Yay! Yay because it's a platform for me to start afresh and it's the end to the upsetting past week. More things went the other way last night with ninny j. But heck, decided not to let it spoil my day. Slept after talking to eu on the phone.

eu, thanks for listening to my complaints, my frusfrations and towards the end of our conversation, my nonsense! Hahahaha remembering the part when I said I need that and your response sets me laughing once again. My roommate must be so disgusted with our conversation that she woke up this morning with her eyes staring at me! Scary!!

Thanks, martian for listening to my ramblings(literally) and the long grandmother story. And being with me throughout the shi*t. Thanks to pw who listened yet was little confused by it. :)

Met kim at her place today. Finally learnt to take the LRT and bus. Wah tedious and long. But anyway that was a good start to this week. And shall sleep now to continue having a good start. Nite all!

The one where it was so unexpected

My precious friends from Singapore took a whole lot of effort to send this card to me. Their messages are at the back of it. All of them made me tear. I miss you all!!

Thank you, Cut6, thanks martian, thanks shishi. Great appreciation to fy who came up with this idea.

lq, i'll stop crying. Promise. You don't forget the karaoke session yeah! You're right. I won't like it if I go with them yesterday as I'll be immersed in smoke. Ewwww!!!

Fishing Pissed

---Edited---

No point in pointing fingers to others. And hurling my anger at others. I'd be like that person, if I did. So, Hear No Evil, See No Evil, Speak No Evil. :)

I woke up with a bad bad bad, horrible, terrible, unimaginable(What else? My vocab is limited! Haha!) dream. So bad I sweat through it and nearly wanted to dig a hole and bury myself in it. I still shudder at the thought of it. It's a beginning of the weekend and I am doing nothing but blogging early in the morning.

When you wake up in the morning, you have TWO choices. Numero uno, make full use of your day and be happy. Deux, dwell on the past, live in it and lead a sad life. What is your choice? I choose the former. :)

Don't forget my existence, please.

Another week has passed. Safely. Or should I say boringly? Nothing happening this week. Press conference- could not make it. Shooting- could not either; due to miscommunication. And I feared that I had nothing to write for my logbook. Fortunately, after the much struggled research on a certain product, I was asked to go for the creative brief on Thursday. Sounds familar? Yeah! And the creative brief was prepared the same way we learnt in the AM module. Finally something familar, I thought. And I am in the team for the pitch! Yee Haa! I feel a lil' sense of belonging.

Brief was over lunch. Had pizza. Whilst others were busy brainstorming for keywords, I was busy eating my pizza that I did not have the chance to give my ideas. :P Greedy! But I was very hungry ok! And it did not help that they ordered a banana kaya pizza but it was a small one and I could only take one piece. :(

They are having a lil' gathering cum party cum get-together at v's house this Sunday, 4 p.m. for a round of tennis. As usual, they did not ask me. They probably forgot I was there. And let's talk about tonight. They are probably busy singing their lungs off and drinking and smoking and finger guessing and what nots. And yours truly is here staring into the computer screen and typing her entry. How exciting. And the roommate doesn't help. She is ultra unfriendly. Does not even say "Hie" when I greet her everytime I come back. Sheesh! What is your problem huh, biatch!!?

Why is it so hard to notice my existence? Is it because I am not as rowdy and loud as them? I normally like to finish my work as soon as possible, quietly and get more work from others so that I can learn more. Yeah, sure. Send me to mental hospital for being nuts. Ask for more work. But lesson learnt: Keep mouth shut. Real tight when the clock ticks 4 p.m. because if I don't, I can forget about leaving office at 6.30 p.m.

Regrets

I did not go for the press conference, in the end. n threw me research work and I only had around 3 hours (inclusive of lunch time!!) to complete a whole list of things she needed. She needed it by the end of the day and according to her it's p.m. So, my bubble burst. Sure, you could say just tell her you want to go for the press conference. I did and she asked if I was going back to office. Yes and she said she'll wait for me. How she needs it urgently. Anyway, m said I could go for the conference only if I do not have pending work. And since I could not hand up my work within the stipulated time (they were leaving for conference at 2.15pm), I could only express my regret to m and told her I could not go. Despite my enthusiasm the entire morning. Helping her to get ready copies of press release. Disappointed and regrets filled up my entire afternoon. Consolation was that I get to pack up and leave office early. For once. I left about 6. When I got back to the room, I could still see the sun. Thank God! It's the first time I left that early.

Made a lil' fool of myself just now. Was heading up to pay a colleague for my lunch. Opened the door, saw k (mummy's boy) and another colleague smoking. I began to head down instead of up the stairs. After three steps, I felt something wrong and by that time, k called out my name and I turned around. Wondering, I walked up, the right way. He laughed and said, "I was wondering what..." and I quickly butted in with, "I've gone cuckoo already. *smile*"

What an embarassment! A friend of mine *ahempwahem* went round in circles when she chanced upon a handsome dude in her building. Literally round in circles. Whilst I went horizontally. Hahz!

And did I mention I left the office early? Yes, I did. I see that as an achievement. Yay! And met k again at the lift. He was off to see client, I was heading home. Congratulations, me!

Finally something relevant

I am glad. Finally I am doing something relevant tomorrow. Something that I have learnt in my course. Something that I have heard before hitting internship. Press Conference. YES! Heard from cl, media buyer, that Pana******* is having a press conference tomorrow. So I asked what they do prior to that and etc. After lunch, ko, the AD asked me to get the press release in Chinese translation from traffic, h. And email to the client; at his work station. I get this "You don't really belong here" feeling because I don't get a company email. Is it tedious to set up a temporary company email for an intern? But anyway, I was printing out the press releases and organising them (read: staple them neatly) when ko came. I asked him what time is the press release tomorrow and he said, "3.30. Do you want to go?" Me: "Can I?" ko: "Can. But there's nothing to learn." :) Finally, I get to go for a press release!! It's going to be at the hotel where we had our company CNY dinner. Yay yay! I got to go for press conference! ko also informed me about a photoshoot on Thursday which I can go look-see too! Yay! Why all the good stuffs come when I am leaving this department?

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pw and I were talking this morning. And she pointed out so many things that I should not harp on ehemtehem. She hit the bull's eyes. What she said was so logical but I was the irrational one who refuses to probe deeper and get to the root of the problem and face up to reality. Sigh, slap me, pw. Slap me!!

Tell me your response. Will you want to get to know guy A, who is a such a looker (to you, obviously) or guy B who is a not-so-good-looking chap? First of all, if he is not good looking, you would not even consider getting to know him further, right? Looks count. First impressions are very important.

What are your standards of a good man? One who does not smoke, drink and has a career and treats people well? Are those YOUR standards or is it the SOCIETY'S?

Bumble Bee

I was a bumble bee for today. Tearsheets and filing in the morning. Transcription took me the whole afternoon. Rewind and rewind and rewind. Listening to those women talk was okay but the chitter chatter with all the buzz was hard for catching their words. As a result, I was so tired that I napped for 10 minutes before waking up. In the conference room. Yes. Bad!

The real pressure came when n chased me for the transcript 5 minutes before their meeting at 5.30pm. I only came down at 5pm okay! And it did not help when nasty colleague, ad, came by and told me that I missed cutting her article from the paper this morning. Uh, like I care! I have no time to entertain her so I just let her blabber whilst I typed profusely at my keyboard, rushing my report. I did not even know when she was finished and walked away. Ahhh bother! Serves her right when could have done it herself yet she still asked me to do when I had to handle 2 clients and 1 client’s new activity report. Sheesh! But to me, those are easily done. Just not pleased with her for throwing her job at me when she is available to do it.

Anyway, after rushing up and down numerous times for the transcript, I finally took a slow stroll back to my station and tidied my place. And the phone at m’s place rang and she called me to take it. It was n and she asked me to be up there again to sit in for the dialogue review. I was kinda taken aback because they did not inform me beforehand but glad at the same time because that, to me meant that I am in the team! Yeah! Acceptance means a lot to me. Yeap.

So it was not me alone who had the low confidence level thingy. It’s tough being a rookie. And it really does not help that there are so many interns before me that might have left their marks with my colleagues and the company.

The only mark I left so far was my black handprint on the photocopy machine, due to the newspapers photocopying. Tell me how that is impactful.

Buy! If It Makes You Happy

Met up with d, a very very old friend. Went for lunch and shopped around. Was looking for shoes, tops and belt. Unfortunately, did not see any interesting. Instead she, who was not supposed to spend, splurged like nobody’'s business. It was always this case; whenever I was the one who needed to spend, I never got to. The other person who wasn’'t supposed to spend at all, indulges in retail therapy. Uh, hullo, I was the one in desperate need of one. But anyhow, spotted a pair of dark pink heels priced at RM49.90. I liked it and it was elegant, according to d. Not wanting to act impulsively, I decided to shop around and if I don't see better ones, I'’d go back to that pair at the end of the day. So walked, walked, walked; browsed, browsed, browsed; tried, tried, tried but to no avail. Went back to the same place, wanted to try for that dark pink pair when I spotted a blue pair. Decided I should drop pink and get a different one instead. d managed to convince me it was time to change colours! Alrightie, besides I already have a pink. Tried on, good, stable, nice. Priced at RM39.90. Heart was already itchy but decided to put it on hold. Again. The saleswoman must have been pissed at us, seeing us two times, without purchasing! So the walked, browsed, tried process continued.

Spotted a top, tried it and alright! I’'ll buy. I guess luck is really not on my side. I asked for a new piece as the display one had fault. But that had to be the last one. Oh, thank you! Felt even more depressed!! Felt an urge to pamper myself at nail studio. Wanted to do manicure so much! But managed to hold back. Figured that it’'ll spoil the job when I had to go do grocery shopping later. And it was a trade-off for the heels. Final decision: ta-da!!- the heels! I like the colour, the height, the stability when I slip my feet in. :) After such a long long day!

Like darling lq said, "Buy, if it makes you happy!" I bought it, it made me happy.

Priceless

The gift the darlings gave me before leaving. A lil' blurry due to my not-so-stable hands. Thanks, Cut6!!!

What is L-O-V-E?

What is the four letter word starting with L? What is it that makes everyone fall heads over heels and heads over toes and what-nots? Can we live without it? Is it a need or want or desire? I chanced upon a junior's blog just now and was totally disgusted at her blog. It was her love cocoon with her darling. At the tender age of 20 (the guy) and 17 (the gal), they believe that their love will last. Hello, even those aged 30 and 27 aren't even sure they will be together forever. And here you are, pledging your love for eternity and the bla blas. Isn't it too early to say that? You have such a long way to go and you're tying yourself to the stone. *shakes head* As fy puts it, "kids are like that". I totally agree. Kids are so innocent. Sometimes it's a bliss.

Ignorance is bliss. However, in the case of mtp, ignorance is definitely not bliss. OK! Pardon me for side-tracking a little. Haha, that phrase is stucked with me!! Cut6 should know what's behind this! So, what does love constitute? Do we only have eyes for THE one that we neglect others? Love is not all about your boyfriend/ girlfriend, know. Because if that is the case, we will not be here. Our parents will have no time for us as they will be into each other too much. They neglect us and in consequence, we might have become social parasites. Is that too serious? But that is true, isn't it?

Love your friends, love your parents, love your siblings, love your schoolmates, love your lecturers, love your colleagues, love your boss (*winks* :P ), love everyone! Love your enemies, even! Spread your love around and the world will be a better place.

I'm cynical. I admit.

More Bonus! Clients Listen to Us! More Increment!

Such were the wishes. What more can you expect from the working ones? Company CNY dinner was lousy, in terms of the food. Other than that, it was fun. Sat with the colleagues, more like smokers. Our table was labeled the smokers’ table. t came much later and he sat at the civilized table.

I found a good man. I did! I did! Does not smoke, does not drink. Does not splurge unnecessarily. And such a looker!!! If I had more courage, if I was more outgoing, I’d hook him up man! My ideal partner. *dreams away in NeverLand* I am so so dead and into it. I need to stop!!! I am serious.

Yesterday was endless rounds of “Bottoms Up!!” and strings of uncivilized words. Like f*** and all parts of women and men, too. So so sickening, why must they say all these? Does that make them sound more gungho? Make them more attractive? I don’t think so!! Felt it was really useless and crappy and unnecessary to say all those words. Make you so uncivilized.

Anyway, took a’s ride home. Initially she wanted to stop me at some bus stop. But dinner ended at 11, as we walked to the car, I asked politely and with innocent look whether she could drop me at my hostel itself. She threw me the absurd look and said “No la!! I’ve to U-turn!” She was already so shocked then I just said drop me somewhere that I can catch cab. She kept mum. I felt stupid and terribly guilty. I should have asked t if I could get a ride from him, since he asked. How stupid can I get?!?!?!?!? Really hated myself for that. He already asked, I might as well tap on that and create an opportunity for myself. But heck, no, I stucked to a instead. I felt like stabbing myself last night, really. But a was so so so kind and I am eternally grateful to her for fetching me back to hostel. Though not doorstep. I am sure t will drop me right at the doorstep of the block. Gentlemen being gentlemen. :)

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Today was super super super busy. Clocked in 20 minutes earlier, started on the download content for cel***, relieved the recept’s job from 9-9.30. Rushed down to finish the report. Took me till lunch time. So so stressed because supposed to hand in by 11. :P Now I get the true meaning of us chasing deadlines instead of deadlines chasing us. The deadlines are always yesterday or two days ago kinda thing. Haha! Then it was picking ads for nasty colleague, ad. Nasty nasty nasty! She has nothing to do on hand but I have tonnes and she asked me to cover her ass. Simpy because she needs to do her competitive analysis report! Bleh! Glad I forgot to tell her one of the CD cannot be read, thus the ads for that particular month cannot be picked up. Lalala!

Tearsheets were not complete, filing not done. And the dialogue session has to be transcribed. Deadline is Monday, 5.30. :’( I forsee Monday cropped up in the conference room going through the tape and analyzing their conversations. Dozed off when I had the first time viewing just now. :P So embarrassing!

Anyhow, Bottoms Up, everyone!

Hiccups of utter stupidity

Work cannot and will not go smoothly, right? There are bound to be hiccups. I had my share today. A large share. m asked me to copy some cds yesterday. So I made an effort to go into office early today and I was really early. I logged into the computer, setup everything and load in the cd, waiting for it to read. So off I went to get the cd-r. When I came back, much to my horror, the machine was making some grinding noise. When it stopped, I opened the cd-rom and much to my disgust, my cd was in bits and pieces. I swear it's in bits and pieces, alright! If I had a camera with me, I’d take a picture of it as prove. Else, take a hammer and smash it on a cd. Try. That was how my cd looked like. Damn, I knew I was in for it. I am so going to be dead and smashed like the cd. Bits and pieces. So when m came into office, I broke the news to her, spoiling her morning and day. She was so pissed and angry. I can understand because that is the client’s master copy. Heck, they should have made backup copies. Psst, I know what I can be outside the media and communication field. I can be a Backup Manager!!

m was so pissed and angry that she ignored me. Sighz, I was so so defeated and I felt like applying for MC and go back to the hostel and sleep the day off. I was crushed, like the cd. It was really unbelievable, bits and pieces! Like I intentionally smashed it. I don’t believe something so stupid happened to me. m had to explain to the client when she went for CNY luncheon with them. I was so stressed when she came back later in the afternoon and I asked her how did it go. She got such terrible lashing that everyone knows now. I feel so bad. So guilty. But everything’s cool now. Yupp. Phew! *wipes sweat from forehead*

l actually remembered my name. And I only told him once. He actually takes care of my learning in the company more than my supervisor, t does! He talked to his assistant, e to let me into their team and help out in mapping the client’s ads. It’s not doing creative per say. Actually I am a little confused of my task too. But I will be briefed tomorrow. They handle the telco. I was excited because that is a very fast-paced account and it’s really busy. And it has to fight with its competitors which are quite tough. That is something nice from this department. At least. Now I wonder if I’ll be informed of the dialogue session this Friday, as promised. Hurrr..

f ended my day by saying “Don’t forget about tomorrow, yah!” Awww… that was sweet! And now, I have to go back to get my work done. Yes, your truly brought her work back (new activity report for pana*****) to complete. Simply because I need 100% attention and concentration in making sure I get the work right and accurate. Else, the client will scream their heads off again. There're too many things and people or person ( :P )in the office to look out and hear out from that I cannot put in 100% of my attention.

Disappointment

I felt like a brainless dude today. I think I have smeared the reputation of my course. Arghhhh!!! During the dialogue session, I became mum. Even v commented that I was very quiet. So did t. This was not what I wanted!! Sighz, never did I know, when you’re on internship, you have to fight for your participation marks too. :’( I felt like a total idiot sitting there listening to them talk. Or more like crap, as a put it. But I learnt from the session. How to go about conducting a dialogue session bla bla bla. Towards the end of part 1, I contributed more actively. But part 2: churning out list of discussion topics was horrible. It was 5.40 in the afternoon and I was brain dead. Been in the conference room since 2 pm ok! Hello! Any normal being would need a break, right? I felt like taking power nap like what king suggested but was afraid to just walk out to take a breather while the others were yakking away. v bought breadtalk buns but how can they be helpful when they are just blobs of carbohydrates? Sighz! t was munching on peanuts, like peanuts helped! I felt like a total failure. Total flop!! Not that I did not have anything to say but the others were too fast! Esp n who was superbly quick at rattling her thoughts which was exactly what I was running through my mind! -_- I hate this feeling but I sense that I am not seeing my routine B for assessment, much less my much-craved after A grade.

Well, at least the consolation out of the disappointing session was that I got to observe t from a considerably comfortable distance. How far is one seat apart? :) Happy as a cow! Hee hee! Did not dare to sit directly next to him fearing that I’d go dumb-struck!

Company’s CNY dinner is on Thursday, at H****n Hotel. I am sure smart alecks will get the hotel name. The young celebrity who starred in A Simple Life. (hint hint) If you don’t get it right, it’s alright. It just shows how much of a potato couch you are. I thought I was not invited when colleague f shouted to uncle r this morning. No one told me, not even n, who looks quite pissed at me today. I did not do anything wrong ok! Except to ask her how many respondents we surveyed for the last round of survey. Cheh! Must be PMS! So, I thought I was not asked. However, when I came back down from dialogue just now, f asked me if I knew about the dinner. And I pretended to be stupid and said no. And so she cordially (like she would!) and officially tell me about it. I went stupider by saying “Oh, I get to go?” In her usual ahh-stop-acting look she said yes.

I feel loved...not! Bleh!

Welcome to the corrupted world of advertising filled with lies, sex and drugs.

Advertising has never struck me as a deception world till recently. Whatever people do or how the players in the industry act is one thing. See them out of the circle, you see their true colours. They treat you nicely, be helpful and kind to you when you’re one of them. Turn your back against them, you suffer severe injuries.

On a lighter note, spent my V-day with colleagues m, f and j. Quite a hilarious bunch, esp j. He’s really the joker. But he’s a sweet guy. :) Spent the evening listening to m and f lamenting on their men. Where have all the good men gone to? My theory: All good men are either others’ husbands, boyfriends or they are gays! There! True, ain’t it? So m rebutted by asking why then do wives complain. Simple. Because they ain’t good women! So singletons and “unowned” properties like yours truly is a good catch. Get it?

Ok, this is getting a lil’ out of hand. Many out there will come after me and start bashing me. They will say I am just jealous of the “owned” properties. So what if I am? I am a female after all! And females are allowed to get jealous. :P ‘Nuff digression.

When I submitted my logbook for grading just now, t asked me to go for the dialogue session tomorrow. About how brands affect women. Interesting topic. “No need to prepare, just participate.” Then he flashed his signature smile. Gosh, made my knees go weak yah!

When he gave me back my logbook, he wrote some comments in pencil. He commented on the suggestion I offered when describing one task/ assignment of the week (which was the survey). He said it was a good one but has to meet the objectives set rather than ease of respondents. He commented that it was good!! Then why didn’t he give me an A grade for the assessment?? I’ve been getting B for consecutive 2 weeks and I am craving for an A…!!

Apparently, m told the school and my LO about my leave last Monday. And it was approved. I wasn’t even informed! My email was not even replied! But anyhow, they have approved it so I don’t have to rack my brain trying to cook up something to write for that day.

Got red packet from the company and 2 other colleagues, e and v. Hee Hee! To think that I even complaint to pw how biatchy and flirty v was when she’s with t. But I think it takes both hands to clap. pw suggested that perhaps t likes v. *crushed* I don’t rule out that possibility. He always goes to her room to talk and both will laugh horrendously loud! Ahhh sigh! I wonder when is the company’s CNY dinner so that I can take the opportunity to snap! snap! click! click! (take pictures!!) :P

Ahhh before I forgot, Happy Valentine’s Day, my darlings cut6 and to my dearest buddy, eu and ping who might read my blog and whoever chances by. Remember, Valentine’s Day is not only all about your lover but your loved ones. So spread your love around!

jess, appreciate your glamorous picture you’ve drawn, yeah? Since you’ve already posted the pic on our blog, I won’t post on mine. :)

May Cupid hits his arrow right

Ninny p is attached! Yeah! Finally! Hahaha. I am happy that she has found her Mr. Right. Well, at least I hope he is her Mr. Right. So, when will it be my turn? *hopeful* She shocked me by sending me a sms telling me to check out our groups for his picture. I was directing a friend's car at that time. I was really shocked! And I thought she was just joking. A New Year present for me, she said! :) How thoughful hah!

They were saying while things may not go smoothly for finance and job opportunities for piglets this year, love may hit high note. I hope so la. But my priority is GET A JOB!!! After internship in KL. Did not know that I should panic and start scouting for a job now. Many told me to look out on the www since I am not in S'pore itself.

Hmmm. If you guys have any job opportunities for me, PLEASE INFORM ME, alrightie? Thank you! Hopefully can rope me into Me.d.ia.c.or.p wardrobe where I can then rub shoulders with my idol! Heehee!! *gleeful grin*

Went for the "Convent 2005 Gathering" at Landmark just now. Whoa! I had a shock! Was meant to be just the 3 ninnies and me and s and some others whom we haven't met for a long time. We estimated about les than 10 people. Little did we know that it turned out that words spread like wildfire and about 30 turned up. Much to our horror, of course due to the limited space the hotel cafe is. But luckily, we were thick-skinned enough to make the cafe crew squeeze space for us. Met friends whom I haven't seen since leaving secondary school. Really amazing. Fortunately, it was short and sweet. If it was any longer, I would not know how much cobwebs were growing on me already. It was split into 2 tables and each table had about 2 cliques. And I was back with friends that I spent my first 2 days of CNY with. So what gathering do you call this? Gathering of the multiple cliques, I would name it.

As if I was back HOME

Went visiting grandparents at uncle ek's place at Yishun. We fetched aunt sp back so passed by my apartment (or rather ex-apartment). I felt as if I was back home. Yes, HOME was the word. Weird but true. I used to detest the fact that I had to leave BP so early and get back to studies. But now, it's different! I see the apartment, I miss it. Passed by the school, the building. Brought back numerous memories. Sweet and sour. I don't mind walking back to the aprtment in the rain any longer. I don't mind waiting for buses more than 10 minutes any longer. As long as I am back in S'pore. What an irony, right?No matter how jammed and how packed the bus is, there's always a place to stand, to hold and grip.

Unlike in KL, you've to cling on to the next person for support. OK, the good point is if the bus jerks, you won't fall because you have the person next to you for support. How's that? That's how packed the buses are in KL. If you're unlucky, you have to endure smells. Which I don't think I need to elaborate.

2.5 more months to go. Endure, endure! I keep telling myself to tahan a bit. All it takes it just 2.5 more months and I am done! I can go back to the lil' island. But the friends were saying yesterday at sh's house that this year ain't a good year for us. Those born in 1983. Bad luck. Finding jobs are difficult. Love life faces problems. My priority now is to find a job, not so much on my love life. So, perhaps that's one worry down. :) But of course, I hope to start one this year. *blushes in embarassment*

Oh dear, I dread Monday. First of all, it's V-day which everyone would probably have programmes stacked up and me, being the lonely single dude will be alone, again. I've planned to stay back in office till I finish off the nasty stack of newspapers awaiting me to dissect them. Grrr...!! I reckon that will take me up till 7.30pm if I do it real slowly like a tortoise. I'm so familar with the papers that I know which section to take and which not to and which ads to take and which not to. Sighs! Media monitoring ain't that fun! When can I go out to see client??

Ahhh, forgot to mention that I thought I saw someone who looked like dear Taufik on the street while I was heading home. Simply because the guy on the street is the same race as Taufik. I am paying more attention to this group of people on the street in S'pore since I got the Taufik fever. ;D

Updates for the past week

Came home on Saturday, been busy busy busy busy since. Called the darlings on CNY eve's eve and CNY eve itself. lq's reaction: "Huh? Who are you? I don't recognize your voice at all leh!" Oooh, THANK YOU dearie! But she is always as blur!!! She never recognize voices over the phone. Then jess. Wah she is still as tactless as ever. Haha but I gave her back a taste of her own medicine. When she picked up the phone, I thought I got the wrong number as she sounded old. So I told her the truth. And guess what? She said "No matter how old I sound or how old I am, I am never as old as you!! Haha!" Thanks, jess! Love you to bits huh!! *sarcastic smile* Then pw. She was still at work. Haha! :P I AM mean! Next was yh. It was nice, very nice to hear her after such a long long time. She sort of disappeared for the entire 2 weeks that we were off to internship. No emails, no news, no updates on our blog. NOTHING! And now she is THE cause of the temporary suspension of our group blog. Haha! But she's quite pitiful. New Year eve, yet she has to work and spring clean. Could not get cut6 cheaterbug coz her phone was off and the first time I called her, think it was too late. :P But anyway, I called her a few days before already la. So happy to hear their voices!!!

CNY eve came. Had dinner early then cleaned up. Wah! Haven't had exercise like that for a long long time. Thanks to the temporary non-existence of domestic helper. But everyone chipped in to help, even aunt c. Can see the CNY festive spirit in every member of the house. So cool!

Yesterday was gathering at e's house. Gambled and I lost badly. :'( Luckily, I got my capital back from in-between. Wah! k was lucky to bet ten bucks in the last round! And boy she was lucky! I was so down on luck that even when I place a 20cents bet, I lost. DOUBLE! Grrrr...!! Nanny s's red panty did not work! Hahaha! She threw the 3 of us a cute Topshop panty with red hearts in the midst of blackjack.

Today was frantic mad rush to everyone's house. Went to all nannies' house. Lunch at nanny p's. Yum yum! It's been tradition to have steamboat lunch at her house with her mum's special red wine mee-suah (rice vermicelli). YUMMY!! Then to kim's house for chocs, sh's house for cookies. Hard not to balloon during CNY!!

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Had weird weird dreams past few nights. Firstly, I dreamt that I had a quarrel with cellmate over projects. I was accusing her of accusing me of not contributing to the project. I must have missed school too much!!

Another night, I dreamt that t asked if I will be going to the company's CNY dinner. My reply was "Yeah, sure." And he just nodded and smiled.

What do these dreams represent? The first one, must be the result of me thinking of school too much and the darlings. Second, I must be thinking of........... EATING EATING EATING!! :P Hahahahha! What were you thinking, pw?!

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Oooh, and I got my Taufik autographed CD back!! YEE HAA!! Thanks, wq! Thanks, nanny s!! You both are the best! Muakzzzzzzzz!!!

Out Of The Blue

Seindah tiada lagi kau ku ingatkan
Sayang kau hilang
Menanti biar sampai akhir hayat ku di dunia ini

Kau tahu bertapa ku sayang padamu
Hanya bidadari sebagai ganti
Hanya takdir menentukan ia
Oh belaian jiwa

Oh angin, sampaikan lagu ku padanya
yang sedih pilu
Terimalah lagu ku jadi teman hidup mu
Untuk selamanya

Kau tahu bertapa ku sayang padamu
Hanya bidadari sebagai ganti
Hanya takdir
Menentukan ia
Oh belaian jiwa
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I am amazed. I can memorise the lyrics and sing along with it. However, on Friday, I struggled to speak in Malay when I was trying to say "Excuse me, could you spare about 5-10 minutes of your time completing a survey for me? We're doing a survey on mobile phones." This, I could rattle off smoothly within a minutes' time, in English. But in Malay, sigh! My respondents looked at me despondently and I see the pain in them trying to make out what I was trying to say. Maybe I need to go back for Malay lessons.

Out of the blue, I feel like dedicating the song above to sc who is the dearest friend I ever had. Thank you for always being there for me and accepting me for who I am and putting up with my nonsense and crapping with me and all the whole lot of nonsense. I hope you're well up there.

-Rest In Peace-

Phew!

Whoa! What a day it has been. I was out of office from 10.30 and just came back. Went on field research with n for the client. In other words, go out do survey la!! We combed the city and the outskirt. And my feet's hurting me. Nice to be able to rest it on my CPU. Ha Ha Ha.

Survey was tough as many did not know about the local celebrity that endorsed the product. Not that I know but had some background information about him a week ago. So I think it makes me easier for me to explain to the respondents when they query me.

n told me more about t just now. Hee Hee. Told me about where he lived and they were complaining that they have no friends because their extra time is spent in the office, even on Saturdays! But what me thinks is that ad people spend their weekends working, what... It's common!! THE thing that I did not probe was his marital status. Har Har. That would have been too obvious.

I was so tired yesterday I left office earlier than usual. When I reached the room, I just quickly bathed and slept. From 7pm all the way till 9pm, skipping dinner. Then I had the decency to stop torturing my stomach and downed 2 apples. Then it was bedtime and "Good Night!" I have never ever sleep like that before and I applause myself for that.

k made my Friday morning again. He always do, on Fridays. :) Being the polite and cute lil' mummy's boy. Hee Hee. Ok, 'nuff. As pw said, it's either him or t. Haha! Yupp, and I saw t when I went up to return the stationeries just now. He's back from Malacca, apparently 'cuz n told me that he was going to Malacca to visit a client's plant and learn about them. The client happens to be Singapura's leader in digital entertainment products for the personal computer and the Internet. Do you know who? Yeap, they won over the account and are now working on it. And I am to learn more about them and their competitors. Aiyo, that is tough.

Ahh the CNY dinner is maybe after the CNY break. I thick-skinned la, asked n in the car if I could go. I can probably go, should not be a problem. :D And I hear that tonight one of the clients moved office and so they have a housewarming, studiowarming party which most of them are going. And I am not. *sarcastic smile* But it's OK cuz i want to head back early and pack and get things done! Oooh I so cannot wait for tomorrow but I so dread the week after as I can forsee the stacks of newspapers that I have to get my hands on. An entire week! They are so going to drown me when I come back from the break.

Power Nap

Power nap was awaken by that pile of files beside me falling over to the computer. Hmmmph this is the first time in the internship that I have taken a nap for 15 minutes. Tsk Tsk. What a lazy intern! But it cannot be helped since one- I have been deprived of sleep and two- I have nothing to do. At all. I have been a good girl, clearing my work and all. And now, I am left with nothing on my hand to do. Even the competitive analysis report for the client is scrapped. We don't have to do that any longer. WHEEEEE~~~!!!

Had a minute misunderstanding with m and lauya AD, k. k came by and asked m to see the client's ad which has been jeopardised by its competitor (I don't think I should name the competitor). So, m asked for solution. k mumbled “Write a letter to them and tell them lah.” That was what both m and I heard. Then m said, “You ask me to write the letter?!” but k said “No, I said I write.” But we seriously heard that he did not mention that he would write it. So m defended her stand. k turned to me and asked if I heard him say he would write it. I just gave a pathetic smile and kept quiet. But he thought I nodded (?!?) and said to m “Yes!!See? Even she said yes.” Wah thanks yah! All I did was to flash a pathetic smile and I got used as a bullet. Thank you! Then I explained myself to m and even m thought she saw me nod. Sigh!! What in the world is happening to people’s eyes??

After lunch was F-R-E-E-E-E-E-E- all the way. Till now. Alright, the only work I did was to go through tones of TVCs stored in the media bank. TVCs of our clients and its competitors. Dated all the way back to January 2001. I estimate there are about a hundred CDs inside the bag. And I have only finished 3% of it. Then I decided to “take a break”. Déjà vu! Ha ha!

Submitted my logbook again to t for assessment. He looked sooo stressed at his workstation! Got some facts about him from n over lunch just now. Ha ha ha! And I got a B for my assessment for last week. I thought he’d be kind and give me an A. Hurr!

The telco account people are really busy, often out of office. This weekend, there’s a roadshow. Next couple of weekends too. How nice! Downside? n and s stayed back till wee hours this morning to finish work. s just went home, shower and come to office again. Power!

And oh, n came by and told me that we'll be going to some ulu pandan place in KL where it’s populated by a certain race to do the client’s survey. Yay! *hint: it’s on mobile phone and it’s THAT client who’s always full of ideas* Get it?

And something interesting about the telco client’s competitor. al and her team were going to propose this to the client when the competitor came out with it first. It’s so cool, I tell you! That I am even considering switching to the operator! :P Check it out!http://www.digi.com.my/enhanced/community/bubbletalk/

Who am I?

When evening comes, when night falls, I feel like a different being. I feel weird, I feel lonely.

Up till this point in time, I refuse to enjoy this city. It’s not my cup of tea or coffee or milk. Whatever. It’s so congested and I don’t mean the traffic alone. The people, the houses, everything!! I am not being racist here but I really don’t like the dark-skinned people lurking around where I work, where I stay. I feel threatened. I live in worries everyday, not knowing what to expect. Will I be robbed or will I be dragged into a car and never see sunlight again? All these fill my mind every single day. Freaky but true.

Today is a public holiday for KL. Stayed in room the entire day, trying to finish the portfolio. The furthest I’ve gone out today was to the rubbish bin outside the room. Pathetic. I feel like a worm, struggling to climb to where I want to go. And where I want to head now looks so so far away.

When t asked me whether which area I want to embark on and why. I was dumb-founded for a while inside me. I had to grasp an answer that will look like I am certain. Yes, advertising is where I want to set my foot in. “Are you sure?” He questioned me; I questioned myself, my inner self. Is this where I want to be?

To think that all along, I told myself this is where I want to be. But I am having doubts now. This is not right, isn’t it? I am regretting my decision. Am I regretting the decision because of what I see in those people or am I regretting because of this city?

I need to do some searching. I need to find myself back.